Listen to the article:
As parents we take pride in doing our best to understand our children better than anyone else. However, sometimes that can cause us to focus on their weaknesses more than their strengths. Likewise, many of the professional assessments of children place more focus on weaknesses and ways to overcome them, especially when dealing with disabilities. However, if you find that your child is struggling with learning specific things, rather than focusing on the limitations, take a step back and look at the big picture.
Challenges are a part of life and one of the best ways to overcome them is through having a healthy level of confidence and self-esteem. Whether your child has a learning disability or is merely struggling with a certain subject in school, sometimes it is more beneficial to place your focus on their strengths rather than trying to overcome a weakness.
It is a natural tendency to place attention on the obvious: i.e. “Jimmy is our math whiz; Brianna is our athlete.” These perceptions can overshadow other strengths that might help identify problems. Put aside the typical discernments and take on a different approach by clearing your mind and observing your child’s actions and behaviors and refrain from drawing any conclusions. Take into account how your child uses his free time in various scenarios. Does your child spend several hours on homework? During the observation decipher whether or not she is extremely detail oriented or has the ability to focus on one thing for a long time. Maybe your observations have caused you to notice your daughter wants to adopt needy animals, in which case, she might be empathetic by nature and would thrive by helping others. Does your son tend to boss his friends and classmates around? If so, he might be a born leader. Perhaps in prior situations if you noticed your child routinely refused to listen to instructions, it was not that he was trying to be defiant, but rather it was an indication that he thinks outside of the box, is independent, and strong-willed. While many of these responses might have been viewed negatively before this exercise, hopefully after seeing things in a different light, you’ve identified strengths that you can nurture and help your child develop to his fullest potential.
Make a commitment to explore opportunities that will engage your child’s strengths through various activities. It may take some trial and error to find the right fit. Encourage conversations that consist of completely honest feedback and open dialogue about strengths and weaknesses and how they can impact self and others. Overall, it is oftentimes much easier to identify the struggles of our children, but by concentrating on their strengths we can help empower them so they will be happy, successful, and well-rounded.
Thought Starters:
- Reevaluating Perceptions and Observing Behaviors: Reflect on how you currently perceive your child’s abilities and consider taking a fresh approach by observing their actions and behaviors without preconceived judgments. Think about what these observations might reveal about their unique strengths and talents.
- Understanding the Impact of Focusing on Strengths: Consider the potential benefits of shifting your focus from your child's weaknesses to their strengths, especially in the context of learning challenges or disabilities. Ponder how this shift in focus could positively impact their confidence, self-esteem, and overall learning experience.
- Exploring Activities that Align with Your Child’s Strengths: Contemplate various activities or learning environments that could engage and enhance your child's identified strengths. Think about how you can facilitate experiences that allow these strengths to be further developed and utilized.
- Encouraging Open Dialogue About Strengths and Weaknesses: Reflect on the importance of having honest conversations with your child about their strengths and weaknesses. Consider how this open dialogue can help them understand and appreciate their own abilities and how they impact themselves and others.
- Empowering Your Child Through Their Strengths: Think about how identifying and nurturing your child's strengths can empower them to be more successful and well-rounded. Reflect on the role that empowerment plays in fostering happiness and achievement in various aspects of their life.
Suggested Questions To Ask Your Child:
- What part of your homework do you enjoy the most and why?
This question helps in identifying what the child naturally gravitates towards in their learning process, which can reveal their strengths or interests. The article emphasizes observing children’s behaviors and preferences to identify their strengths.
- Can you tell me about a time you felt really proud of something you did?
Asking about moments of pride can help a child articulate experiences where they felt successful or skilled. This aligns with the article's suggestion to focus on the child's strengths and positive experiences to boost their self-esteem and confidence.
- How do you like to spend your free time?
This question aims to understand the child's preferred activities during free time, which can offer insights into their strengths and interests. According to the article, observing how a child uses their free time is a key method for identifying their strengths.
- If you could choose any activity or project to work on, what would it be?
This question encourages the child to think about their interests and what they would choose to do if they had complete freedom, helping to identify their natural inclinations and strengths, as suggested in the article.
- What do you think makes you different or unique from your friends?
Asking the child to reflect on their unique qualities compared to their peers can help them identify their own strengths and abilities. This question is in line with the article's focus on recognizing and nurturing individual strengths in children.
