Listen to the article:
It is important that you always seek opportunities to give your child a compliment. Oftentimes as parents, we are so focused on teaching them what not to do that we forget to recognize and point out when our kids do something right or display a natural talent or strength. Receiving compliments helps children feel accepted, appreciated, and boosts self-confidence. Here are ten characteristics that children should always be complimented on.
#1 Character. As adults we know the importance of moral values and integrity, so when you notice your child demonstrating small acts of kindness, being polite to a stranger, or being honest by admitting to breaking a vase, take time to compliment them with praise.
#2 Contributions. Let your children know how much you appreciate help with the dishes. Compliment them when they pick up trash from the yard without being asked or help a younger sibling put away toys. By showing them you noticed these sometimes small details, will help them understand the importance of contributing.
#3 Achievements. Share in their joy when they achieved something new. “Great job, you did that task without any help!” or “Look at you! You’ve really improved.” Complimenting achievements increases positive moods.
#4 Obedience. Become more observant of your child and hand out compliments generously when he is being obedient and respectful. All too often, we take the good behaviors for granted and wait to swoop in on the bad behaviors.
#5 Personal Style. Once your child takes an interest in choosing her own clothes, let her know how proud you are that she put her own outfit together. Even if it isn’t something you would have picked out, it will encourage her to use her creativity, imagination, and nurture her need to express herself.
#6 Work Quality. A quick response of “good job” is beneficial and it only takes a moment to compliment your child on work quality. Perhaps he cleaned his room much better this week, or wrote his homework in his neatest penmanship, your acknowledgement will communicate the importance of quality.
#7 Effort. Complimenting the efforts put forth in any endeavor will teach your child not to give up. This is important even if your child makes a mistake, or misses a deadline. Help him understand that things don’t always go smoothly and explain the importance of sticking with something and following through.
#8 Friend Choices. If you truly like the friends your child has chosen, let her know by saying something like, “Katie seems really nice, I’m glad you two are such good friends.”
#9 Progress on Reaching a Goal. It is easy to recognize the final outcome of a goal, but oftentimes the step-by-step process required a lot of hard work that deserves a compliment as well.
#10 Their Existence. Don’t take this one for granted. Letting your child know how happy you are that they were born and are a part of your family will let him know he is appreciated, valued, and loved.
Thought Starters:
- Recognizing Character Traits: Think about moments when your child demonstrates good character, such as honesty, kindness, or integrity. Consider how acknowledging these traits with a compliment can reinforce their importance and encourage your child to continue exhibiting them.
- Acknowledging Contributions and Achievements: Reflect on opportunities to compliment your child’s contributions to household tasks or their achievements, big or small. Contemplate how this recognition can boost their sense of accomplishment and self-worth.
- Appreciating Effort and Perseverance: Consider how you can acknowledge the effort your child puts into tasks, even if the outcome is not perfect. Think about ways to praise their perseverance, teaching them the value of trying and the importance of resilience.
- Encouraging Personal Style and Creativity: Reflect on moments when your child expresses their individuality, such as choosing their own clothes or creating artwork. Think about how complimenting their personal style can encourage creativity and self-expression.
- Valuing Their Existence and Presence in the Family: Contemplate the importance of expressing to your child how much they are valued and loved simply for being themselves. Consider how such expressions of love and appreciation can strengthen their sense of belonging and self-esteem.
Suggested Questions To Ask Your Child:
- Can you tell me about something kind or helpful you did today?
This question encourages the child to reflect on and share acts of kindness or helpfulness, aligning with the article's suggestion to compliment children on their character. It provides an opportunity for parents to recognize and praise these positive behaviors.
- What was your favorite part of helping with [specific task] today?
Asking about a specific contribution the child made, such as helping with chores, allows the parent to directly compliment the child's efforts. This aligns with the article’s emphasis on recognizing and appreciating the child’s contributions.
- How did you feel about completing [specific achievement or task]?
This question focuses on the child’s achievements, whether it’s a school project or a personal goal. It opens the door for parents to compliment the child on their success, as suggested in the article, reinforcing the child's sense of accomplishment.
- I noticed you chose your outfit today. What inspired your choice?
This question acknowledges the child's personal style and creativity, an aspect the article recommends complimenting. It shows the child that their choices and individuality are noticed and valued.
- What’s something new you tried today, even if it was challenging?
This question is designed to highlight the child's effort and perseverance, key traits the article suggests should be complimented. It allows the parent to praise the child for trying and persisting, regardless of the outcome.
