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Parenting is one of the most difficult jobs of a lifetime and as we personally walk through all the ifs, ands, and buts of raising our kids, it can sometimes make us feel utterly unprepared. While there’s no singular how-to manual for raising kids, you can still do your job successfully when you follow through with confidence and consistency, so you can enjoy the satisfying fulfillment of parenting.
Below are tips that will help you teach and rear your children with poise and self-assurance.
Point Out the Positives. In an effort to educate kids, it is so easy to react when they mess up, but what about responding when they are being good? Look for opportunities to point out what your child is doing right: “You put your dirty dishes in the sink without being asked. Thank you so much, that is great!” or “I saw how you shared your favorite toy at the park today. That was very kind of you.” When good behavior is encouraged, it motivates your child to do more of it.
Boost Your Child’s Self-image
Before children can even crawl, babies begin to develop a self-image based on the response they receive from parents. Children internalize body language, voice tone, facial expressions, words, and eye contact according to the responses they receive from parents. And, from that they begin assessing how well they accept themselves.
Receiving praise for even the smallest accomplishments is vital to your child’s positive self-image. Therefore, choose words, tones, and non-verbal cues carefully when communicating with your child. Negative comments can be just as hurtful as a spanking to your children. Give out hugs, kisses, and words of encouragement often and wholeheartedly.
Set Boundaries and Enforce Consistently
Enforcing rules and boundaries is necessary for keeping children safe and for teaching them patience, respect, and self-control. Define what your limits are and decide how you will handle disobedience, making sure that your expectations are realistic for your child’s age.
Once you’ve defined the boundaries, communicate them with your child, and consistently enforce the rules regardless of how busy, tired, or distracted you may be. Initially it will take more effort on your part but in the end your child will learn important lessons and you’ll both be on the same page with expectations and understanding.
Communicate Clearly
It isn’t realistic to expect children to do what they’re told without also providing an explanation. When implementing rules, clearly communicate them along with the expectations and consequences. Through taking the time to do this, your child will understand the reasons for the rules. It’s also okay to listen to your child’s input and consider finding a compromise as well. Oftentimes, when children are given a voice in decisions, they are more motivated to obey them.
Although it’s not always fun or easy, teaching and correcting your kids is important and the way you go about it is even more crucial. Always show your kids unconditional love and when mistakes happen, work through them together.
Parenting requires a major commitment of time and energy and it is the most important and rewarding jobs you’ll ever have. So, taking time for self-care should always be a priority. It is far from being selfish because it will rejuvenate you so you can be the best role model possible for your children.
Thought Starters:
- Positive Reinforcement: Emphasizes the importance of acknowledging and praising good behavior in children to boost their self-esteem and motivation.
- Establishing Clear Boundaries: Stresses the need for setting realistic and age-appropriate rules and consistently enforcing them to teach patience, respect, and self-control.
- Effective Communication: Highlights the necessity of explaining rules and their reasons clearly to children and considering their input for better understanding and compliance.
- Role of Unconditional Love: Reminds parents to show unconditional love and support, even when correcting or disciplining children, to maintain a healthy emotional bond.
- Parental Self-Care: Underlines the importance of parents taking care of themselves, as a well-balanced parent is better equipped to be a positive role model and effectively manage discipline.
Suggested Questions To Ask Your Child:
- What do you think about the rules we have at home?
This question encourages children to express their opinions about family rules, promoting open communication and understanding.
- How do you feel when you're praised for doing something good?
This helps parents understand the impact of positive reinforcement on their child's self-esteem and motivation.
- Do you understand why we need to follow certain rules?
Asking this clarifies if the child comprehends the reasons behind rules, ensuring they're not just following them blindly.
- What would you do differently if you were in charge for a day?
This gives insight into the child's perspective on decision-making and rule-setting, fostering a sense of responsibility and involvement.
- Can you tell me about a time you felt really proud of yourself?
This question encourages the child to reflect on personal achievements, boosting their confidence and self-awareness.
